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Thursday, August 21, 2014

Of memories and more, I'm back! :)

It's been 1 year, 5 months and 1 day since my last blog post. I hope you all still remember my existence! :)
Joyee's back in the game after a tremendously long hiatus!
Now there's a reason why I chose to write today. I guess now's the time to vent it out for good, and hey! What's better than writing about it? :D (Let us ignore the fact that I am in 12th grade now and I should ideally be studying :P)

Well, 2014 has been a strange year. Remembering the 8 months which flew past me is an overwhelming experience, a whirlwind of emotions. I can't help but notice the tear rolling down my eye right now too. *sneakily wipes off a tear*
The most integral part of 2014 has been the amount of confusing times I've been through. Yes, there were gains and incredibly happy moments which I would want to relive everyday of my life. But, all that I've seen slipping out of my fingers this year, has taught me lessons which I would carry with me throughout.
I've loved and trusted many, a few of them left me in an unknown space of complete oblivion when they suddenly chose to walk out on me.
I've inspired myself to believe and go on with the different rhythms of life, but sometimes, all my beliefs and all the strength I gather in myself, seem to disappear leaving no trace of their existence behind.
I've lost some very special people I've known. Few of them still lurk around with their presence in my life, and a few of them are in their heavenly abode ever since god decided to take them back.
All these 'incidents' made me question everything and everyone I know. There was a time when I was caught up in this completely unknown dark space of chaos in my head, and I did not find any way out. All I did was hope, but hope isn't always very friendly to us.

Her eyes, moist with tears
Her face, red with unknown fears
As she lived and constantly battled the universal force,
All the strength she had ran out, left a heavy residue of remorse.
The dawn of reason, the courage to fight
Always stayed in the back of her mind
But was all this suffering for no apparent reason worth it?
An answer to that question, she could not find.

Things which make you go weak in the heart, things which break you down would keep bombarding you on a daily basis. After one point, you would condition yourself to the struggle.
But, I guess this struggle is what makes you complete. It makes you the person you should be to face this world full of adversities. These adversities would not make sense sometimes, you would never be able to figure why and how some things happen to you. Amongst the mist of chaos life throws you into, there would always be a silhouette of reason. Sometimes, you don't need to look for this reason. Maybe it'll come right in front of you someday or maybe it'll just choose to subtly exist behind the mist.

So here's a big shoutout and super cuddly hug to everyone who is, has or will be going through a difficult phase in their lives. I am not counselling you on the fact that things will be alright and neither am I trying to tell you about what I was going through previously. I just want you guys to know that YOU are not and never will be alone. This world is a vast space of endless opportunities, in which your life may be full of havoc and pandemonium, you must always remember that life was never created so that we could exist in a world of complete equilibrium and idealism. 
Savour the chaos, devour the pain. It makes you a stronger person than you have ever been. At the same time, engulf yourself in the small things which make you happy, enjoy every second of every moment which gives you happiness or peace. 
So let your heart hold fast, for this too, shall pass. :)

'Jo na jaane, haq ki taakat,
Rab naa deve usko himmat,
Hum mann ke dariya mei doobe,
Kaisi naiyya? Kya manjhdaar?
Haq,
Bass kari o yaar,
Ilmu bass kari o yaar'

- Bullehshah

I hope my return is welcomed back in the blogosphere, I promise, I shall try my very best to regular.
All my love :*

1 comment:

  1. Heya....came across your blog some days back..your pieces are really worth reading. :)

    ReplyDelete

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